If only I knew what I know today..

februari 29, 2012

WAT HAAT IK DIT.

OMYGOD. OMYGOD. I’m so angry at the moment! This is soo unfair! **** my life, really!  Oh god if you only knew how I feel right now, I cannot explain it. It’s just.. there are no words for this..

I was NOT allowed to go uit when I was 15, and I didn’t! I didn’t even went out when I was 16! Now my fucking little sister just became 15 (not even three days!), and she went out secretly before (but I knew she was going to, I just didn’t tell my parents) and NOW THE **** SHE GOT MY PARENTS SO FAR THAT THEY LET HER GO OUT! WHAT THE **** IS THIS ****ING BULLSH*T. **** THIS **** YOU WHAT IS THIS? HELLO? DON’T I EXCIST ANYMORE LIKE WHAT THE ****?!

That idiot spoiled tw*t gets everything she wants! mother of god what is this bullsh*t? Is everybody blind? Helloo, i’m having BIG problems here, and they don’t see it! Seriously, life is so unfair. I know that you shouldn’t compare people to eachother and i’m not trying to, but this is so bad! GOD I never expected this to happen! MOTHER KEEP YOUR HEAD UP. SAY NO WHEN YOU SAY NO. GOSH CAN THESE CAPITAL LETTERS GET BIGGER PLEASE? MY ****ING GOD I HATE THIS!

I really wanted my life to end. It feels like I messed up everything. Not just this, but I was thinking about what she has and what I have. And I have nothing. I have no friends to go to and omygod I am a loner. I really wish I could end my life. I am so depressed, I don’t know how to look for help. **** the parents, i’m not going to them anymore. I’m done. I want to move out so badly. I just don’t know where to go.

I want to say keep strong and hold on but I don’t know if that is ever going to happen.

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